…I saw my disordered eating through a different lens. I realized it was a normal response to the signals I give my body via thoughts about food restriction or permission, and that it is related to beliefs I hold about myself and my value. In recognizing this, I am able to stop having pity parties every time I do something I consider ‘bad.’
Recovery from bingeing or chronic dieting is very possible, but it looks different for everyone. I used to wonder what was wrong with me that I could not follow the most common advice on how to stop overeating and bingeing. It took a while to realize I had to use what worked for me.
When I realized it was time to stop dieting and start eating, I was excited. It was not like the excitement you get when you find the next great diet that would change your life forever, though. It was more of an acceptance; like a relief.
…I knew I had to start trusting my body and letting it tell me what and when to eat. It was not easy, but it was much easier than trying to control the uncontrollable urge of a craving.
What if I could change my thoughts instead of my eating behavior? Eating does not HAVE to make me feel guilty. I choose to feel guilty when I eat too much or eat a forbidden food. And if I have a choice to feel guilty, I also have the choice to NOT feel guilty. I don’t have to berate myself.